I just had to share this Daily Devotional I found online. Don’t ask me how I found it or which blog led me to this amazing website. I was randomly clicking through various food blogs in my never ending search for delicious, healthful recipes and one of them did not have a post about food but instead a post about an online Bible study. Another thing I am always searching for is a way to connect with God and learn more about His word. When I checked it out I knew this was for me! I already have the YouVerse Bible on my phone and sometimes read plans on my own but I have yet to finish a plan. This is just the accountability I need!
You know I have been searching for this at my own church to no avail. Is it a Catholic thing? Is it me? Am I too sensitive? Am I too rigid in what I want that I am unwilling to bend? Am I too scared to ask for what I need/want/expect? This devotional is really helping me focus on God and what’s important. I’m actually doing two right now. I am following the Living the Surrendered Life plan along with the Soul Detox plan. I can’t describe the peace I have felt since I started this on Saturday. I am sticking with the daily plan for the Surrendered Life plan because that’s what the bible study is now. But for the Detox plan (that was the one they did last time) I just can’t put it down! Isn’t it great how God can speak to you? I mean, through a food blog of all things!
Allow me to vent for a minute. We thought in joining our new church less than a year ago we would find fellowship and like minded people. Maybe make some new friends and hopefully feel a sense of belonging to a community of Christian people. We tried to join/create a small group, but there wasn’t enough interest. It was literally just me and Matt in a church of hundreds and hundreds of people. Is it a Catholic thing? The beauty of mass is that you are all focusing on God’s word individually, it’s like meditating. But there is not much desire to do that in a small group. Okay, so we’ll try a different approach. We volunteered at the church auction. Matt and I were assigned to two different rooms. Divide and conquer, right? The lady I worked with did nothing but vehemently complain about her children. As I sat there listening to her I prayed for her and her family. She was toxic. Ugh! At the end of the night as I was trying to clean up I was chastised for doing what someone had asked me to do. This lady (younger than me) was yelling at me?!?! For helping? Really? Matt was frowned on for asking for a name tag. Anyway, our volunteering experience was less than stellar. Matt joined a men’s group but it’s mostly men older than our parents and not much for the wives to do. There is a women’s group but it meets once a month during the work day and they are the group that provides food for funerals. I like the idea of baking or preparing food for that but where’s my fellowship? We were asked by the priest to join a stewardship group and the people were nice but we didn’t really feel like our voices were heard or that that group was for us. So my quandary is keep searching for ways to belong here? Or move on? I think we haven’t been to mass at our church at all in 2012. That’s what I pray for, to know if we should stay or go and to have the courage to go where God leads us.
We kept hearing about how welcoming and friendly that church is. But we haven't felt that. In defense of the church they have been through some major tragedy (national news worthy) and may be on the defensive a little. I don't know (thankfully) hope you cope with the betrayal and abuse they experienced.